In our first Casting Call feature we look at who we think could play whom in a live-action adaptation of one of our favourite cartoons, The Venture Bros.

Hank Venture
Matt thinks – Michael Cera
I can’t get over Cera and Eisenberg actually being twins for once. They’re basically the same fucking person. Looking at it, maybe Cera should be Dean since he seems more wimpy, but the rounder face screams hank. These two guys are probably too old, but I just can’t shake it that they’d be perfect as the bumbling twins.
Sam thinks – Michael Cera
I threw Hayley Joel in the mix, but Matt's on the money. Cera and Eisenberg wussy white boy dopplegangers and the two of them on screen at the same time would be the perfect way to draw all those Snoopy t-shirt wearing girls who play toy instruments who've never seen Venture Bros. into the cinema. Mickey C might need to get some neckerchief confidence if he's going to pull this off though.
Honourable mentions: Hayley Joel Osment

Dean Venture
Matt thinks – Jesse Eisenberg
Same as what I said for Cera, obviously. Eisenberg and Cera all the way for me.
Sam thinks – Jesse Eisenberg
Yep, Eisenberg and Cera. Eisenberg also has an excellent face to sweater-vest ratio.
Honourable mentions: Alex Frost, Matt Bennett

Doctor Thaddeus Venture / Rusty
Matt thinks – Rainn Wilson
The self-hatred and personal loathing screams the nerdy, geeky, turkey-necked Wilson for me. It’s not so much Dwight from The Office as it is just Rainn Wilson being a good actor. I’d have total faith in him portraying that mix of selfishness and insecurity that the Doc has.
Sam thinks – Rainn Wilson
I'm going to agree with my colleague here, Wilson can pull off the arrogance hiding sheer fear that Rusty Venture needs. Plus seeing his goofy head in a bald cap is too hard to pass up.
Honourable mentions: David Spade, Scott Adsit, Paul Scheer, John Malkovich, Jeff Goldblum

Doctor Jonas Venture Jr
Matt thinks – Peter Dinklage
This isn’t just because Peter Dinklage is little. It’s the fact that Peter Dinklage has the perfect arrogant voice that Dr. V Jr needs. The fact he’s little only helps it. Whether you’re looking at Game of Thrones or any other film where Dinklage is a successful smaller-than-normal dude, he’s an absolute winner who steals the hearts of the audience. Since Doctor Venture Jr is meant to be a complete dick, it would be a challenge for Dinklage – one I’m sure he could pull off.
Sam thinks – Peter Dinklage
Ok maybe this is just because Peter Dinklage is little, sorry for typecasting.
Honourable mentions: ???

Doctor Jonas Venture
Matt thinks – Alec Baldwin
Once the almightiest of Baldwin’s came into my head, I couldn’t think otherwise. Success, looks, fame, fortune, loved by women and envied by men. At least, this was Alec in his prime.
Sam thinks – Alec Baldwin
Yep, King of the Baldwin's. He might need to clench his jaw a little more than normal though.
Honourable mentions: ???

Brock Samson
Matt thinks – Patrick Warburton
He might not have the exact build, but no real person does. Put a blonde wig on him and watch him go. Considering it’s Brock’s voice that makes up 90% of the fun, how could you possibly go with anyone else? Besides, we’ve seen Warbuton in a muscular role when he played the live-action version of The Tick. He’s big enough to throw a muscle suit on and be convincing. No argument.
Sam thinks – Patrick Warburton
There is no Brock without Warbuton.
Honourable mentions: Ron Pearlman, Mickey Rourke

Molotov Cocktease
Matt thinks – Lake Bell
First of all, Lake Bell is a fucking fox. She’s got the perfect look. Throw in a goofy generic East-European accent and it’s done. I wouldn’t imagine if there was a live-action of TVB that Molotov would get too much airtime, but it would need to be funny and sexy. Those two things are Lake Bell, hands down.
Sam thinks – Christina Hendricks
Our first disagreement. Trouble in paradise? Probably not, I just want to see Christina Hendricks in an eye patch and a black leather suit. I'm probably letting my testosterone get in the way of my casting, can you blame me? It's the only way Jessica Alba has ever landed work.
Honourable mentions: June Raphael

Sgt Hatred
Matt thinks – Rob Riggle
Originally I was on team Marino for this. That pathetic, laughable past-his-prime annoyance that is Sergeant Hatred is absolutely Ken Marino on Party Down. But then Sam threw in Riggle for Brock, and I said he’s more Hatred. The more I think about it, he has not only the build but also the stupidity and over-the-top personality that Hatred truly needs. Sorry Marino, but you’re out of this in my books.
Sam thinks – Rob Riggle
As much as I want to see Ken Marino in this role, looking at the photo of Riggle on Wikipedia sold it for me. Plus the guy is ex-Marine Corps. How is it not perfect? His permanent case of the shouts helps too.
Honourable mentions: Ken Marino, John C. Riley, Louis CK

Triana Orpheus
Matt thinks – Aubrey Plaza
If you want a teenage(esque) girl who hates everything and everyone but is still cool and loveable, you don’t go past Aubrey Plaza. Triana might be too nice for Plaza to play, but they even look a little alike.
Sam thinks – Aubrey Plaza
Matt's right. It's kind of hard to think of Triana's disaffection without hearing Aubrey Plaza's monotone quips in my head. Triana probably is a little bit too nice, but I'd also hate to see Ellen Page ruin this hypothetical movie for me.
Honourable mentions: Kat Dennings, Brittany Snow

Dr Byron Orpheus
Matt thinks – David Schwimmer
If Ross was a necromancer whose wife left him, he would be Dr Orpheus. His child that he loves, that eagerness to get back to his better, more successful days – I think Schwimmer could really pull this off. Plus he needs to be in something else other than Friends. I was trying to find a place for Matthew Perry, but couldn’t realistically think of anyone he could play.
Sam thinks – Tim Curry
I'm not convinced that Schwimmer could pull off the bellowing camp necessary for Orpheus. Curry is about the right age and I think he could work up a cross between Frank-N-Furter and Gomez Adams for this role.
Honourable mentions: Will Arnett, Gary Oldman, Robert Downey Jr

Al
Matt thinks – Fred Armisen
I was originally A.D. Miles or Ricky Gervais, but Sam nailed it when he threw in Fred Armisen. He could do Dana Snyder’s voice. He’s slightly past his use-by-date. He’s loveable and funny and witty and sharp. Armisen 100%.
Sam thinks – Fred Armisen
Thanks Matt. It's always nice to be validated. Armisen seems like the kind of guy that can pull off pretty much any character you throw at him, I don't think it would be too much trouble for him to play a gay alchemist with a bit of a chip on his shoulder but a good heart.
Honourable mentions: Nick Kroll, Ricky Gervais, David Spade, A.D. Miles, Joe Lo Truglio, Matthew Perry

Jefferson Twilight
Matt thinks – Don Cheadle
I was stuck on this one. I threw in Samuel L Jackson as a joke, but I couldn’t really think of anyone. Cheadle might not be the perfect call, but I’m yet to see him in a bad role. I’m not fully convinced but I’m sure Don could do it easy enough.
Sam thinks – Don Cheadle
Don Cheadle seems like he has secret comedy chops. Maybe not so secret, he's done a fair bit of work with Funny or Die lately. I originally thought Michael Jai White of Black Dynamite fame might be the man, but not having seen him in anything else, I'm not sure I trust that initial instinct.
Honourable mentions: Samuel L Jackson, Michael Jai White

Pete White
Matt thinks – Stephen Merchant
Providing his American accent is up to scratch. That lanky, tall annoyance that is ever hovering over Billy Quizboy’s shoulder. Ricky Gervais could maybe play Quizboy so the duo could be together, but he’d be too Ricky Gervais about it all. Merchant’s got the look and the skill. Done deal.
Sam thinks – Jim Parsons
Ok so I only thought of this one as I was about to agree with Matt. I think I'd just like to see Parsons stretch his legs and play a character that isn't Sheldon, but has enough of the same attributes to find a good groove without forcing anything.
Honourable mentions: Jack McBrayer, Paul Scheer, Doc Hammer, Bill Hader, Sam Rockwell

Billy Quizboy
Matt thinks – Steve Buscemi
It was Chris Parnell or Buscemi for me on this one. Chris Parnell doesn’t always need to be Doctor Leo Spaceman on 30 Rock or Cyril on Archer – that guy can act. But Buscemi has the weird look about him. I’m not 100% on either, but I can’t really think of anyone else who could do a better job. Billy is one of my favourite characters in the show, so I’m trying to do him justice. In the end, I think Buscemi could do that.
Sam thinks – Steve Buscemi
This one was tough, too tough, so I'm taking the easy road and trusting Matt's judgement. I was lazy and went for Warwick Davis initially, but I can't trust any actor that willingly did a schlocky movie about a murderous Leprachaun on more than one occasion. Wait…what about Andy Serkis?
Honourable mentions: Chris Parnell, Warwick Davis, Ricky Gervais

Col. Hunter Gathers
Matt thinks – J. K. Simmons
Again, Sam nailed it with this one. J. K. Simmons is one of the best character actors around. If anyone could play Hunter (who is, in essence, Hunter S. Thompson mixed with Nick Fury), it’s J. Jonah Jameson himself. We all know Johnny Depp does Hunter well, but he doesn’t command the attention and respect that Simmons does.
Sam thinks – J. K. Simmons
I love J. K. Simmons, he's gruff but loveable, he'll bust your ass then kiss it better. Plus Johnny Depp is a twerp.
Honourable mentions: Robert De Niro, Johnny Depp, Jon Hamm, Nic Cage

Shore Leave
Matt thinks – Ryan Gosling
You seriously think I would do a casting call without Ryan Gosling? No way. The man is a dream. Even though others way be more suited, I need to see Ryan Gosling in either a comic-to-film adaptation or a cartoon-to-live-action flick. He’s big, he’s buff, he’s funny, he’s sassy and he’s sexy. Actually, he might not be all of those, but fuck it. Gosling is my boy, and so is Shore Leave. And I want to see Gosling play a gay man.
Sam thinks – Tom Lennon
Ok so this might be a reprise of Lieutenant Dangle in some ways, but I think Tom Lennon has a proven track record of a funny gay guy with a moustache. He's also really good at playing a bit of an asshole. As much as I like Matt's choice (let's face it fellas, we all want to be Ryan Gosling) I can't see me liking him in the role as much as I would Lennon.
Honourable mentions: James Franco

The Monarch
Matt thinks – Bill Hader
No one is better at impressions that Bill Hader. He is the best impersonator I can think of. He’s tall and lean in that lanky way as well, which is what The Monarch needs to be. Throw on some giant eyebrows and watch the magic happen. The funny thing is that Bill Hader is meant to be in an upcoming film where he plays a henchman, and the synopsis sounds somewhat lifted from TVB. But I’d rather see him as The Monarch, where he could be at his best as a larger-than-life character.
Sam thinks – Bill Hader
Again Matt's hit the bullseye. Hader is just too damn good at what he does. I'd love to see him get in the butterfly suit and struggle with his weird Rusty Venture co-dependency issues.
Honourable mentions: Tony Hale, Paul Rudd

Henchman 21
Matt thinks – Josh Gad
Shit, I think Sam has done a better job than me at most of these. He called Josh Gad on this – and that’s perfect. While our two favourite henchmen aren’t all that young in the cartoon, I think in a live-action film they should be a bit younger and inexperienced. Josh Gad is a fat nerd, which is what 21 needs to be. Only problem is, do we see a buff version of him in the movie? I don’t know. I’m not scripting it. Although I wish I was. I’m not sure how fast gad could turn into a buffer motherfucker, but he’d certainly do the chubby 21 a lot of justice.
Sam thinks – Josh Gad
If he's good enough to star in Matt Stone & Trey Parker's hit broadway musical, he's good enough to fill one of the best roles in Venture Bros. Henchman 21 is the loser with the heart of gold, and Gad's big beaming face has that in spades. Granted you'll probably never see him out of his henching ensemble. There's also something fucking hilarious about Josh Gad trying to get in close with our choice of Dr Mrs The Monarch.
Honourable mentions: Bobby Moynihan, Zach Galifianakis, Jonah Hill, Judah Friedlander, Seth Rogen, Kevin Smith, Clark Duke

Henchman 24
Matt thinks – Adam Scott
Hmmm. Adam Scott. I’m not totally sure about him, but he is one of my favourite actors. He doesn’t have the Ray Romano voice that is needed for 24, but that’s okay. I imagine every actor practices that exact voice. I’m guessing that we never see the henchmen out of costume, and that skinny juxtaposition beside 21 would look good. Having just said that I think the henchmen should be young, 24 can afford to be a bit older. He should be a bit of an older brother figure to 21, and be the voice of reason. Can’t you imagine the banter between these two? It’d be beautiful.
Sam thinks – Martin Starr
Sorry Matt, I just threw another late entry in. Adam Scott is fucking fantastic, but now I'm thinking about Party Down and Martin Starr is aloof without the justification of his portrayal of Roman. 24 is a lot nicer than Roman, but I'm pretty sure it wouldn't be too hard for Starr to tone down the snarky rage and be the voice of wisdom.
Honourable mentions: Jason Segal, Jon Benjamin, Ray Romano, Jason Sudeikis, Ed Helms

Dr Girlfriend / Dr Mrs The Monarch / Lady Au Pair
Matt thinks – Kristin Wiig
I originally thought Christina Hendricks on this. The va-va-voom that is needed for Dr Girlfriend/Dr Mrs The Monarch/Lady Au Pair is what Hendricks has, and Wiig is a little light on the bust. But Wiig is one of the funniest (and prettiest in my mind) women in comedy today. I want to see her do more. And she could do this. You’d need to do something in post-production about her voice, but that’s easy enough. Wiig can play anything, and this role could be written right for her to play.
Sam thinks – Kristin Wiig
I love Wiig and I think she could handle the straight man role of the Monarch double act without even having to think about it. If Sandra Bernhard was 20 years younger, Wiig would have some competition, but lucky for her, time marches ever onwards.
Honourable mentions: Christina Hendricks, Sarah Silverman, Katie Aselton